RAISING HONEST KIDS

"Raising children is like baking a cake, you don't know that it is a disaster until it is too late." 

Parenting doesn't have rules to follow or a guide book to refer to, it is a full time job 24/7, no time outs, no rest days.  

I came from a family with strict family rules, Christian values, prim and proper attitude and character which should always conform to the moral and legal standards set by the society. It sure looks like an ideal family on the outside. Well raised kids, strong willed Mother and a Pastor for a Father. 

I am the youngest, apple of my father's eye, spoiled but disciplined (not that well). My siblings envy me with the attention and love that my father showered me, the moment he learns that my Mom was pregnant. I can't blame my siblings. If I were in their shoes I would feel the same.I became rebellious whenever I don't get what I want or if the rules were to hard for me (I always think that way anyway). I promised to myself that I will not make the same mistakes with my children. 

I raised my kids, basically like I was raised BUT in a more democratic way. No spanking, No shouting or raising of voices (though sometimes it can't be totally avoided), my daughters can talk to me about anything  and I encourage them to do so. I am a Mother, a friend and a friend of their friends too. Impossible? NO.

Based on my experience, the first thing that parents should give to their children is TRUST. When the child tells you something, do not doubt the child's sincerity by asking him/her if its the truth. To avoid this fiasco, which might lead to a bigger problem. There is a house rule that states.. "No matter how big the mistake or offense that one has committed as long as that person voluntarily admits it, NO PUNISHMENT will be given." I myself don't break that rule.

Simple house rules that would save parents from worries and headaches. One of my colleagues asked me, why do you always believe your children? They might be lying and you just don't know it. I answered her with great confidence. My children DON'T LIE. I explained to her how it works. 

Parents are NOT always right. Most of the times we repeat the words, actions and rules that our parents had imposed on us, which we HATE so much during our teenage years, and we expect our kids to embrace it with out a fight. Why not put yourself in their shoes and try to hear the words that you are saying? How about accept the fact that YOU can be wrong too and that your 10 year old child is right? Would that hurt? YES, it would hurt your ego. Which is more important? Your ego or how your child would be when he/she becomes a parent too. What legacy are we leaving our child? The choice is yours!